This time two weeks ago I was in Las Vegas on a work trip. I spent seven days away from my Little Man and I loved it. Did I feel guilty – absolutely. Did I miss him – constantly.
Would I do it again. In a heartbeat.
Life has been back on track lately (well my version of on track). I feel like myself. The Depression that had been floating around for months maybe even years has been no where to be seen.
Yet one thing that has stood out to me, as the old “Me” reacquaints herself with this world, is a distinct lack of desire to blog or spend much time online.
It’s as though that part of my life belongs to the downward spiral mindset I had grown accustomed to. I have no doubt, a big part of why I blog has been self therapy, reaching out and connecting with others. A desire for new friendships.
In my week in Vegas I was surrounded by adult company. I shopped, partied, had amazing conversations, dressed up, was inspired and motivated at my work conference and learned all sorts of things related to my profession.
I caught glimpses of men checking me out and smiled inside that they had no idea that lurking behind my new found confidence was an insecure Mummy who belts out her worries and thoughts to strangers in an online world. It felt good to be seen in that way again.
Just to be seen.
So reality sets back in. It seems I have changed but my surroundings here haven’t.
I now need to figure out what moving forward looks like.
For me it’s the only way. There is no going back.
{Image taken walking down The Strip after way too many beers!)
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